Friday, July 13, 2012

False Advertising

Why?!?

Why do men do this?!? It doesn't look remotely natural.  As a man, when I see a man in a toupee, I feel pity for him.  Personally I've been shaving my own head for about 25 years now.  Hair is completely overrated on a man.  Who in the hell do men think they're fooling when they do this?!?

I'm not even gonna get into women that wear wigs and extensions.....I don't want to even try to fight that fight.  Ladies as far as I'm concerned, it's your hair as long as you've got the receipt.
Okay I will concede the hair thing, but why do women with small breasts wear push up bras to imply something that just isn't so?!?
I know companies like Victoria's Secret and many others make a whole boatload of money on these "miracle bras".  But at some point in time, the bra comes off and those mosquito bites and flapjack titties will see the light of day, then there is no pretense.
To me, push up bras and butt pads are the same thing as men stuffing their pants with socks. I mean seriously......what's the point?!?
The cold reality about women and butt pads is that when a woman removes her jeans......she's actually removing her butt too..........right?!?  That's can't be a good look.  What's the point?!?
 
When we stuff what we see as our inadequate parts and pretend to have parts that we really don't have, aren't we all just promising something that just isn't there?!?  Do we seriously want to pretend to have shit that we really don't have?!?


I know we all want to put our best foot forward, but this is all false advertising right?!?

48 comments:

  1. Losing your hair is a very difficult thing for men and women. I think it's a lot easier for most men to let go of the hair. Women find bald guys pretty sexy, at least I do. It feels good to rub my hand across a smooth sexy bald head. Hmmm what was I saying before I got distracted lol.

    But seriously, it's very devasting as a women to lose your hair. It's very hard to explain but it's like part of your identity has been taken away. It took me three years to get up the nerve to go without my wig or scarf. And I was terrified the first day I decided to go out in public with no hair. But now I can't imagine myself with hair anymore. It was very liberating to let go of the "hair" . But I agree we should be ourselves and allow people to take us just as we are.

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    1. When I first started shaving my head I had a full head of hair; of course, I was only 20 or so. Of course now when I cut it, there's less hair.....and much of it is gray. It is what it is.

      I've seen more than a few attractive women that rock a bald head, some of them models.

      But to your point, losing hair for some of us is traumatic. It sounds like you handled your situation better than most. I used to work with this guy who had an obvious toupee; and one day he showed up to work without it with missing hair and a story about malaria taking his hair overnight. I tried to keep a straight face...I tried anyway. That didn't end well.

      Like I said, I don't have quite as much hair to cut now, but that just makes it easier to cut and I don't have to spend quite as much time doing it. With my slowly retreating hairline I figure since God is cutting it, I'll cut it too.

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  2. The scene from "I'm Gonna' Get You Sucka'" comes to mind

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    1. Like minds think alike John. I also experienced that particular flashback while writing this post.

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  3. I could not have said this better..From one bullshitter to another...Job well done son!! lol

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    1. It is what it is Dirty Red. If it walks like a duck and it quacks like a duck, it ain't a goddamned chicken.

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  4. This post makes me feel better about the fact that, when I remove my jeans, but ass is still VERY much there. I can't believe girls buy things to get big asses, ha.

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    1. That's exactly how I feel about men that stuff their pants with socks Allison.

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  5. I can't add anything. You asked and answered it! LOL

    I laugh at toupee'd guys also. And I can not stand fake hair, though I will never say that outloud. I have a coworker hair is schizophrenic. Monday it can be Halle-Berry short and black. Tuesday it can be straight, brown and reaching her shoulders. Wednesday it can be curly and black. Thursday it can be be cornrolled on top and back with afro puffs on either side of her head, and friday it can be in a black pony tail reaching past her shoulders. Seriously

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    1. There is a woman I work with who has a wig for everyday of the week too. She actually has nicknames for her wigs and isn't opposed to talking about them as if they're real people.

      To me it's far worse when on a Monday a man is balding and he shows up Tuesday with one of those ugly pelts on his head. They might as well wear them with chin straps because they are so very obvious.

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  6. Someone please call 911 because Reggie has stolen my thoughts. I've been fortunate that I've always regarded my hair as an accessory. I modeled for Paul Sebastian School of Hair Design when I was still in the UK age 13-15, so my hair was always going through some changes. It was when I moved to the US that I saw how much emphasis was put on hair. To date, I still treat it as such. When I was on medicine from the breast cancer, my hair took a massive hit. I was upset about it, but it was more from not knowing what to do with my broken, brittle, and uncooperative hair...I went natural and have looked back since. That aside, I think women need to stop allowing society to dictate their level of beauty. As I said in a previous post, I've gotten MORE attention (though unneeded) from men with natural hair than ever before. I love seen bald or low cut styles on women. I see it as a sign of confidence, strength, and power. I have MAJOR issues with push up bras, butt enhancing jeans, etc, and have joked about the "bait and switch" for years. My breast often look larger sometimes than they are due to my bras, but I have little control over that since one is real and the other an implant as a result of my mastectomy and reconstruction. Never to I act as if they're all natural; though I'm fortunate I don't have to since my boyfriend doesn't care. He sees the residual scares as a sign of my beating the cancer.

    My personal life aside, I couldn't agree with this post more. We've become even more pathetic in terms of what is deemed beautiful, appropriate and the quest for youth/sexiness. It's all subjective anyway, so we could save ourselves a lot of time, money, and energy just being secure in who we are and live our lives to our OWN standards.

    That's my two cents in the bucket Reggie!

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    1. Thank you BluJewel for your very personal heart felt comment.

      I know a few women that have fought the cancer fight. The fortunate ones walked away, some scarred, some not. All of the survivors are indeed fortunate. I suppose it's easy for me to say that, but I do believe that. One of the ladies I work with now has just started chemotherapy. She shaved her head earlier this week and sprayed a pink dye in it for a Mohawk look. In solidarity, I may allow her to spray some pink dye in mine for a week or so. She's a very nice lady.

      When I was an undergraduate an African professor of mine from Nigeria and I had a lengthy conversation about the fascination of hair with the American "black" as he called us. He barely took a comb to his and I guess he engaged me in the conversation because I kept mine shaved and I spurned Jheri curls, gels and all types of other stuff. I've always been natural, I wouldn't want to put anything in my head.

      While like minds might think alike BluJewel I almost blogged about all the facial studs I've been seeing lately. It seems so many of our young and middle aged women are getting them......maybe next time?!?

      Thanks again for the heart felt comment.

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  7. Gotta agree with ya Reggie. I don't false advertise...never did and I belong to that particular club for small chesticle folks. Friends used to tell me to buy push up bras but, I wasn't having it. I've never been self conscious about them though so maybe that's why I never felt the urge to pretend to have something I didn't.
    The hair thing however just rocks my last nerve. Last week I was behind this chick who had a weave all the way to her butt and it was not hair that contained her DNA. She kept playing with it and flicking it like a horse the entire time. I was like...really? Ya gotta play with it like a Barbie Doll now? Really? I don't see how they walk around with all of that hair hanging down in this heat anyway. My own hair reaches the bottom of my shoulder blades and I keep it in a bun because it's too damned HOT to be having hair hanging and getting your neck all sweaty in this humidity!
    Men just need to leave the rugs alone because bald men are sexy.

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    1. That's okay Bayou Creole, I'm sporting a B cup myself.

      The horse hair thing I think is funny too. We've all seen someone flicking their hair all over the place as if it's been there for years. My ass. That's just silly as hell and I always wonder just what the person doing it is thinking.

      I can't even imagine stuffing a sock down my pants. What happens when a man does that and he and a woman are stipping and a sock falls out........what happens?!?

      Does she just laugh and leave?!? Who thinks a woman would stay after that?!? She might laugh or she might bolt, I'm thinking those are the only two options.

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  8. I soo feel you here Reggie...I have the noassatall syndrome and thought about butt pads...but decided against for this reason...I have never had complaints...Its just my own self consious...

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    1. Yeah that "noassatall" syndrome is a real bitch I hear. But seriously, it is what it is. What we're given at birth is what we have. Putting butt pads on and using push up bras isn't exactly like putting lipstick on.

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  9. You are definitely on point wit this one Reggie. I can't wait to see your commentary on facial studs.

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    1. I'm not hating on the facial studs.......I just don't understand the vast numbers of them that I'm seeing daily. I know these fads come and go, but I don't get the whole stud thing.

      Thirty years ago there weren't very many tongue, nipple or studs anywhere else on the average American woman; and yet now that's changed big time.

      I just don't understand, most I've seen aren't even attractive. I can't think of one that I've seen that I thought enhanced someone's face.

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  10. That miracle bra bit made me laugh. You do make valid points, though. I'm all for being natural. I personally don't have the time nor patience to be bothered with padded bras, weaves, and booty pads. Too much effort, IMO.

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    1. Ain't it though Queen of my Castle?!? It's a whole lotta effort to be trying to perpetrate a fraud.

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  11. With the dude on top, he's not false advertising. Even the blind can see that his hair is fake. He's the lone soul who can't.

    As for the push up bras, Lord have mercy with trying to put the breatesses 6 inches higher than God placed them! It's unnecessary.
    Butt pads, sock stuffers, and the rest, y'all need to just accept the truth and make what you got work for you.

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    1. Yeah but he's still perpetrating a fraud by merely having that coonskin cap on his head. The only thing it's missing is a chinstrap Anna Renee.

      Why can't we all accept our individual realities and move on? Must we pretend to have physical shiznit that we really don't have?!?

      Ya know, I never owned a muscle shirt, because I have no muscles.

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    2. See, and not having muscles aint never stopped you, has it?

      Just like my only having half of Kim K's shape aint never stopped me!!! LORD! Hahaha!

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    3. Nah but I still don't have muscles, hence no muscle shirt for me.

      That's hilarious Anna Renee!!!

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  12. I don't get the fake hair on men. Especially when you can afford a hair transplant if its that important to you. But woman, they are their own worst enemy. They talk about each other all the time... The bra industry changed bra sizes years ago because of woman wanting to be that natural number 36. You know, 36-24-36 use to be the number. A 36 bra today is actually a 34 or 35 bra years ago. Women had become that vein, because they think every men wants a big breast. I look at it like this, If I don't need two hands to hold a breast up while having sex, ( a real breast) then that means its busy touching something else. Which means more fun for everyone.... As far as women hair, more and more are going to the natural look and finding out that is what they should of done years ago. Get the chemicals out, don't worry about the gray, feel better, live longer. Jamie lee Curtis is a prime example of that. She is still doing movies and commercials with her gray hair.

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    1. I've always thought that hair is completely overrated on a man, its just so unnecessary.

      Thanks for the interesting facts about bra size....I didn't know that.

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  13. Men are visual. Out here in California it appears the more fake you are the more attention you receive. Even if they know it is all fake some men still chase and want it. Many women feel if they don't look like Kim, Nikki or Beyonce they are not beautiful so they spend lots of money on hair, bras, pads, etc.

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    1. This is true Queen of Hearts. It's not lost on me that society and it's pressures are somewhat to blame for much of this. While you would think that what's inside would be important, clearly society says otherwise.

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  14. Low self-esteem is part of the problem. Many people look in the mirror and do not like what they see. It's easy to go out and buy a new outside, but a new inside is a whole other thing.

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    1. Now you're preaching the word. We all need to see the beauty within.

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  15. Do grown up men really stuff their pants with socks?

    On the hair issue, I agree that bald men are sexier, depending on the shape of the head though. And I don't care what personality or good virtues you possess as a man but if your hair is jheri curled, braided or anything besides cut low or bald my eyesight will obscure you.

    For the females like me. There isn't any big issue about hair in Nigeria except amongst the expatriates. We wear it natural or put in extensions as we like. Most of us wear extensions not because we don't like our natural hair. I and the people I know do. You'd see that on my blog whether I have in extensions or my natural hair does not stop me from taking outfit photos. Though I've observed that most 'black' bloggers either go all natural or with extensions all the way. I love the versatility that extensions give (not wigs). And I always try to keep it believable in length and style.

    On the bra issue. I have small breasts which I'm absolutely proud of, but I wear the very softly padded bra for a little cleavage. Not the kind where my breasts come completely together. The kind where there's still that flat area between. I think it's sexy, but then I'm female. I also wear the very softly padded bra so my clothes fit better. I love that my small breasts let me go bra less and wear deep v necks on the rare occasions that I do. Besides, no one's complained about my small 'chesticles' :D

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    1. I wouldn't know if grown men actually stuff their pants with socks Inez. But I do feel sorry for those men that feel like they have to.

      Inez it's always a pleasure to have you come to my blog. It would be nice if I had more of my African brothers and sisters dropping by to comment.

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  16. Dont knock the booty pads. yo. Those of use who can't...do. LOL

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    1. Really?!?

      MochaPeach are you pulling my leg?!?

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