Saturday, June 30, 2012

What in the flapjack tittie hell?!?

I don't know where you are, but here in South Carolina it's hotter than three levels of hell outside.  While temperatures are hovering around 100 degrees, the heat index with all this humidity is closer to 115 degrees.
Like many places of business, my office offers casual Fridays.  Monday through Thursday we're supposed to dress business casual.  Of course there are rules and regulations around dressing down.  But just like every office, there's always a hoochie or two..........or seven who pushes the envelope way beyond the policy laid down by the powers that be.

Why you gotta ruin shit?!?
If when you put on a skirt your ass looks like two pigs fucking in a sack?!? Why in the flapjack tittie hell would you wear that shit to work?!?


It ain't sexy!!!


If your granddaughter is rocking it........that doesn't mean that you can wear it!!!


Why in seven hells would you wear clear heels to work?!?

 

If you're a man and when you put on jeans and walk outside and the squirrels chase you.....don't wear that to work!!!


You know damned well you're not supposed to wear tubetops or spandex to work!!!



What possessed you to wear a red thong with white pants tighter than pantyhose two or three sizes too small?!?


Just 'cause you wore it back in the day when 8-tracks were the rule....that doesn't mean it's good to go now!!!


If you put on something tight (and why in the hell would you wear that to work anyway?) and everyone can see that under your skin it looks like you've got nickles or Skittles under there. Why in the holy hell would you wear that to work?!?


If you're showing more skin than fabric, you've underdressed for work!!!


But even if you're not going to work..........it still ain't sexy.  You know damned well you're wrong for dressing like that and making the rest of us aware of what's going on under your clothes.  There are some things you're supposed to keep to yourself; and the fact that you have more rolls than Wonder Bread or stretch marks like a tiger.......that's your business and I'd rather not know myself!!!


This post isn't about having a few extra pounds.............it's about right and wrong!!!


Some of these people are as wrong as two left shoes!!!

You know you ain't right!!!
Just because it's hot; that doesn't give anyone the right to go to work dressed like a hot mess.  You've got a mirror, just like I do.  If I can cast a critical eye before I leave for work, so can you.
I've always believed that rather than 7 dwarfs, there were originally 10; and the other 7 asked Cheesy, Funky and Nasty to leave!!!

57 comments:

  1. lol @ flap jack titty and hoochie or two..........or seven - I get where you're coming from with this post HOWEVER lemme say this- (because I'm honest about my body and the fact that I'm fact so people have to try really hard to offend my fat ass) The shirts I wear often times do show that im got a few loaves of wonder bread on my back WHY? because I like my clothes to fit my body not look baggy and make me look bigger than I am...2ndly I'm fat- people can see that so I figure why beat myself up about how I look and how the rolls on my back look until im ready to lose the weight and get rid of Mrs Bairds Buttery finest lol I know a lot of people are turned off my rolls - I am too I dont like them being back there but right now until I take off about 40 lbs looks like theyre going to be there so Im not going to cover the rest of my body just to hide those - and my Tiger stripes lol (my stretch marks arent that visible as some ive seen but when I wear shorts they're there- when I wear sleeveless tops they're there- oh well lol)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Miss K, I don't know any of us who couldn't stand to lose a pound or ten.....seriously. Now keep in mind, this morning at 7:30am I was out and about walking. I walked to a grocery store a little more than two miles from where I live and back. I did it just for the exercise. Some more of us could stand to do that on a regular.

      Just 'cause they've got it, they shouldn't always flaunt it. I'm sure you respect yourself when you go to work, but everyone isn't you. Everyone doesn't respect themselves......or the rest of us for that matter.

      Delete
  2. Oh and I forgot to mention there were 2 things I recently wanted to wear to work that I decided against because I always ask myself a few questions first before I wear something to work - is it so tight that it will also draw male attention OUTSIDE of work? (don't wear it) is is something youd pick out for a night to the club? (DONT fucking wear it lol) Does it show too much skin that it would also attract attention OUTSIDE of work (dont wear it) so I skipped the pencil skirt that grips my ass and thighs like WHOA and the shirt that makes my D breasts look like im a triple D lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wrote this post because I saw something at work yesterday that offended me; and while I won't go into it......because you never know who reads this shit. Suffice it to say, it was foul and wrong as two left shoes.

      I get you though, sometimes we have to cast a critical eye when we look at ourselves.

      Delete
  3. This is so on point! I was surprised and annoyed to see some women, much more fleshier than me coming to work with halter top sundresses, and just because you are wearing a sweater, does not excuse 78% of your boobage! Whats next, skinsuits, daisy dukes? SMH, we do have a dress code, but somewhere it just got lost and out of bounds.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know that women will go out of their way to accent those parts of their anatomy that they think are extraordinary or at least positive.......but c'mon really?!?

      Every office has that hoochie who thinks it's alright to show that 78% MizRepresent. I just wonder what is she thinking?!?

      Let's just hope that no one shows up in Daisy Dukes.

      Delete
  4. Someone once told me to dress for the job you want, not the job you have. So I've always been in a situation where I'm more professionally dressed than just about everyone. Sometimes even the bosses.

    Because of that I am also acutely aware of people who are way too dressed down for work. And the thing I notice is that if they get away with it once they will continue to push the boundaries of decency until someone calls them into the office for a talk.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Val these hoochies don't think beyond what they're gonna wear tomorrow, much less some job two years from now.

      In my office, underdressed hoochies are sent home to change and it impacts their attendance.

      Delete
  5. Also, I heard that Satan called South Carolina and said that he wants his weather back! You and the fam stay cool, Reggie!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If Satan owned both South Carolina and hell he'd live in South Carolina and rent out hell Val.

      Delete
  6. What's up Reggie? Stay cool there in S.C.

    Btw, lol@squirrels chase you.

    ~Chap
    www.insaneasylumblog.com

    ReplyDelete
  7. Try and stay as cool as you can; I definitely agree that some people on Casual Fridays pushed the envelope a bit too far.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Cheesy, Funky and Nasty. That's funny.

    I've not actually seen anyone at my work place dress against the unwritten policy. And I can't see myself wear spandex to work for the simple fact that I teach secondary school. Heck, I'm even conscious of wearing it in my free time in case I run into one of those teenage boys.
    lol.
    i keep my form fitting dresses for the once in a very long while night out or the occasional travel to see the bf.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See Inez the difference is that you care. Some of these hoochies out here just don't care....or maybe they don't realize that they're trifling?!?

      Delete
  9. I've always worked outside of the corporation and we always dressed down. So no one I've worked with has ever felt the need to go hog wild on these freedom days like dress-down Fridays.

    But it's a trip how competitive some women are in the game of showing skin to attract a man. So much so that when it comes down to common decency and getting attention, they err on the attention side. They be showing more than what necessary to get the job done, often defeating their purpose. And they aint always overweight. A slim woman can show too much and end up looking ugly too.

    LOL at the squirrel thang Reggie! Personally, I thought it was cheesy when men wore those tight ass pants, choking their goods like that. It wasn't sexy IMO.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anna Renee I guess it could be that they're doing that to try and attract men, but.........

      Most of the time they look really trifling, I mean really really trifling. It's not about weight, thin people have cellulite and stretch marks too.

      I've seen the squirrel thing a couple more times than I can count and that's not something a man needs to see....ya know?!?

      Delete
  10. You funny as hell, Reggie. My job has a zer tolerance for such violations of dress codes. You get fired, on the spot.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We usually send them home to change and we count it as an occurence. But for multiple offenders, I have no problem with termination of employment.

      Delete
  11. LMFAO funny post Reggie......and yeah would wanna be staring at meaty arse like that all day long at work!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah Barefoot Countessa who would want to?!? Why doesn't "she" understand that singular fact too?!?

      Delete
  12. Wow...so many mixed emotions seeing this! It's soooo sad! It's sad that your self esteem is soooo low that you think this is the only way to get love or attention. It's even sadder that they dont have any true friends! How do I know?? Cause a true friend would not let you leave the house like that. (Sighs) SAD!!!!!!!!
    Any hoot...hiya been Reg!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah Tia and it's really sad that they don't have a mirror, 'cause if they did.........

      Delete
  13. We had casual Friday until they started coming in the building like they had just left work at the strip club. Some of them actually had...lol
    Are you familiar with She-She's on Chef Hwy down the block from We Never Close?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is She She's still open?!?

      No way!!!!

      BayouCreole you just gave me a serious flashback!!! My friend Kevin and I used to go there years and years ago. I saw the grossest shit that I ever saw in a stripclub in She She's, but I'm way too much of a gentleman to say what it was. There are gentlemen's clubs, stripclubs and tittie joints. She She's is a tittie joint. There is absolutely nothing classy about that place..........other than you can stop by We Never Close and get a shrimp po-boy while you're over there!!!

      Delete
  14. Yeah Reg, She She's opened back up after the storm. Man, you don't even have to say what you saw cuz, I already know...lol
    I actually worked with some chicks who stripped there. A few of them asked me to pass over to see their act, I was like "HELL NAW!" They had already told me what they did in that place...I didn't want to see it! LOL
    Reg, there's gentlemen's clubs,strip clubs,tittie joints and then...She She's!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well I guess even though every place in the East didn't open back up, all the essential places did open. When I get back to The Big Easy I will go to We Never Close. Now if I'm by myself.........maybe I will go to She She's.

      That place brings back memories....some of them halfway good. You might see a dancer in She She's with fresh stitches, some old bullet wounds or someone dancing in their second trimester......or something really gross.

      Delete
  15. pics #1 & 2 are called mampy chicks :-) characterised by that dont-give-a-shit attitude. the more insecure they are the more outrageous the outfits

    if u ever visit i'll take you to one of the dancehall raves in London. full of mampy. we can compare notes after (if u havent been jacked and dragged of by one of them lol!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chrome where in the hell have you been?!? I was starting to wonder if London sank into the ocean or something.

      Welcome back my brother!!!

      I've been pretty good at avoiding muggings in these types of joints Chrome. But I try to avoid liquids so I don't have to go to the restroom and I only frequent lighted areas. A man's gotta be careful ya know.

      Delete
  16. OMG! I almost choked laughing at this post. I've seen many an instance of this and it wasn't always on a Friday. I've seen cases of women thinking they're so damn cute, they can rock their club heels and overly tight ish to work. I've seen men wear dress shorts so tight they looked like they had yeast infections or some kind of rash happening.

    I know I push the envelope in the summer by avoiding underwear (bras/panties) under maxi dresses or long skirts, but I no one knows unless I say something; wish I don't of course.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ya know, I've seen instances of this every day of the week that I've been in the office. Some people just don't get it. So many young people go to work dressed like they're going to the club or to their other job....the one with the pole.

      One year in an office I worked in, it was announced that "tasteful" dress shorts would be acceptable. Well that lasted about three days. This guy came in looking like an 11 year old in shorts.......he looked absolutely ridiculous. He kinda blew that rule to hell all by himself.

      No underwear BluJewel........how you get away with that?!? I almost wrote a post called "Jiggly" when I wrote this one.....maybe I still will?!?

      Delete
    2. I get away with it because no one knows. My maxi dresses and long skirts are typically not form fitting and even the dresses that are, the waist area is looser; giving one the impression that I'm probably wearing a thong. I've got issues with VPL (visual pant lines) As for being braless, the dresses are shaped where one isn't necessary or I can wear a vest, cropped jacket, or light sweater over the top.

      Delete
    3. Yeah, but see you have taste BluJewel, not everyone else does. It's sad but people put themselves out there to get attention I guess. I suppose my blog is like that in a way. If I was conservative and posted political or some really deep shit, I wouldn't get as many comments as some of the scandalous shit I post. In that way, I guess I'm an attention whore too.

      Delete
  17. I think music videos(half dressed artist and dancers), air brushed magazine covers, and distorted body images are to blame. Victoria is not even a secret anymore. Nothing is left for you to imagine. Anything goes at work or church. Just express yourself anyway you like.

    ReplyDelete
  18. That first picture ruined my eyes. Thank you Reggie.

    I blame Nicki Minaj.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Yeah that first one is pretty foul isn't it?

    ReplyDelete
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