She knew damned well her baby was ugly.......oh, and I did get a pedicure.

 The other day I was just minding my own business, trying to get through yet another hectic day at work; when I was confronted with one of those moral dilemmas that we're all faced with from time to time.

This year one of my New Year's resolutions was to just be honest, regardless of the circumstance or situation.  Just when I think everything is going well where that is concerned. Here comes this rather "handsome woman" fresh off maternity leave sticking a picture of one of the ugliest babies I've ever seen in my life in my face. 

Then she has the utter audacity to ask "Reggie, isn't my baby adorable?!?"

So I looked at her and then I looked at that picture of her baby....and I looked at her again and I said "Well, look at the baby." She wasn't satisfied with that answer so she asked again "Reggie isn't my baby adorable?!?" So I looked at her again and then I looked at that picture of her baby and I said "My my".  She wasn't satisfied with that answer either, so she asked again "Reggie isn't my baby adorable?!?" So I looked at her and I looked at that picture and I said "What a smile!!" She wasn't satisfied with that answer either, so she asked again "Reggie isn't my baby adorable?!?"  So I looked at her and I looked at that picture again and I said "Well, maybe he'll grow up to be an athlete?!?"  At that, she stormed off......fortunately, she took that ugly ass picture with her.

Time and time again I've heard people say that there are no ugly babies.  Of course we all know that's bullshit, there are plenty of ugly babies and plenty of ugly people too.  Now the baby  I saw the other day wasn't the ugliest baby I've ever seen; but he was certainly ugly enough to scare a hungry dog off the back of a meat truck.  That was an ugly baby, all it needed was a piece of cheese or a cigar in it's little mouth.


I'm at a point in my life where lying just isn't that cute to me.  I don't want to ever lie again....so, if you don't want to know the truth as I see it, then don't ask.  Because I'm going to tell you the truth.

Okay.....on to the next topic.


As I was saying in my last post, lately I've seen some pretty busted hooves. I know you've seen them too. The temperatures have been rising lately and I keep thinking......I need to take care of my paws and my hooves too. 

See, I think it's important for both men and women to take care of both their hands and their feet.  One of the reasons that I was attracted to my wife was because she has beautiful feet.

As a matter of fact, she was the first woman that I ever remember looking at and thinking....."she's got some really nice hooves." 

Full disclosure......I just love looking at that woman's feet!!!

 If your dogs are barking and your paws are ragged, I'd suggest you take your ass to the nearest salon and get that shit taken care of.  It is that time of year and the last thing I or anyone else wants to see is someones busted hooves.

Some of you may have noticed that I was missing in action for a few days, from this past weekend until the beginning of the week.  Well I took the wife to Myrtle Beach for a few days of rest and relaxation.  Now I'd been to Myrtle Beach a few times, once to fly to Miami and a couple of other times to go shopping.  But before this past weekend, I'd never seen the beach except when I was airborne on my way to South Beach. We had a great time and while I was there we stopped and got manicures and pedicures......that's right, Reggie will get them.  However, although I did have a manicure six months ago or so, I hadn't had a pedicure in a while.......well, to be honest, in a long damned time.  The "lady" that gave me my pedicure kept making faces while she scrubbed my heel.  She kept mumbling under her breath in her native tongue to the "lady" (who looked like a dude in drag) sitting next to her giving my wife a pedicure.  I took a picture and captured the moment for prosperity below.  I shouldn't have tipped her ass, but I did.  See, I don't hold a grudge.  Besides, she did some justice to both my paws and my hooves.

 I almost took a closer picture of my feet, but I didn't want to make any of you jealous.  After all, mine are some rather nice hooves........they are now anyway.