Sunday, March 3, 2013

Those damned Girl Scouts!!!!

 Damn those Girl Scouts!!! 
 
I saw them standing in front of the grocery store again today.   Those disgusting little wenches!!! Trying to look all sweet and whatnot.  Pimping those damned tasty assed cookies and trying to lay that heavy guilt trip on a brother.
You know.....their "Please mister please buy my cookies."
 
 
 They must go through some serious mind altering psychological training to learn how to make those pleading eye faces like that damned cat from Puss N Boots.
I can't let them get me, I can't be deterred!!!
 
 
I'm trying hard....so hard to eat right and exercise on a regular.
 
 
 I exercise on a regular basis, not to get buff mind you; I'm just trying to avoid getting titties.  Titties on a man just aren't cute.
 
 
I'm trying to knock this B-cup I'm sporting down.  Sure that C-cup looks good on my wife, but it sure as hell wouldn't look good on me.  If mine get any bigger I'm gonna need a manzierre or maybe even a bro.
 
Trust me that's just not a good look on a man.
 Truth be told, I'm a straight up fiend for some Thin Mints.  Some Thin Mints and a big ass glass of ice cold milk are the business!!!
 
 
I've sat and eaten a sleeve or two of those damned cookies many a day.
Do you like Girl Scout cookies?!? I sure as hell wish I didn't!!!

215 comments:

  1. HAHA! Reggie they are some good cookies. The famous "Samoas" are my favorite.

    Question Reggie, why the price keep going up every year with the box shrinking but there's no extra cookie? I think for 4.50 we should at least have a extra cookie and half.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmmmm, I think I paid $3.50 per box today Ann. For years they were $3.00 a box. I've been buying them for years and years but I don't remember paying any less than that for them. You're right though, those boxes are shrinking.....the cookies probably are too.

      I'm not a fan of the Samoas, but I did buy 6 boxes of cookies today, 2 of them were Thin Mints. There have been years that I've bought 10 boxes of those bad boys.

      Delete
    2. Reggie down here they are going for 4.50 a box.

      Delete
    3. Wow!!!

      For such a little box too. Next year maybe they will be $5 a box?!? $4.50 is a tad bit too much in my mind.

      Delete
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    1. This post is about Girl Scout cookies, not breast enhancement. What does that have to with this post Anonymous?!?

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  3. Yeah, they were in front of my local grocery store too on yesterday, Reggie. They almost had me, I like the peanut butter cookies, until, like Ann above, I noticed how small the boxes are now. They almost look like a snack size. I guess everybody is trying to squeeze in a little more profit these days, even the Girl Scouts.

    Another reason I didn't buy any was because the troupe was all White. I live in a very, very diverse area so it's a little strange that there were only White girls selling the cookies. What's up with that? Are Girl Scout troupes segregated?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Damn this recession Val, it's starting to impact those tasty cookies too!!!

      Damn those politicians to hell!!! Must they take the joy out of everything?!?

      There used to be this little blonde haired girl that lived in my neighborhood a few years ago, before I sold my house and moved. She didn't work with a troupe, she worked alone. That little wench would go from house to house, right down the street. Taking all her cuteness with her, smiling with those baby blues trying to guilt a brother into buying her cookies.........and damn me I did, again and again, year in and year out. Her father drove a big truck the size of a small bus, big gas guzzler that could carry around dozens of boxes of those cookies. She would show up like clockwork. I'll bet she sold hundreds of boxes in my neighborhood alone. We probably sent that lil heifer to Hawaii or someplace.

      Okay wait a minute, did I unzip my blackness to buy those cookies Val?!? Yeah they were all white.....but I wasn't looking at black or white, just the green on that box.

      Are you saying I've gotta go out now and buy more Thin Mints from a black Girl Scout?!?
      Did I violate a blackness clause by buying Thin Mints from a non-black Girl Scout?!?
      Damn!!!
      Damn!!!
      Damn!!!
      They've got me again Val!!!
      Everytime I get out, they keep pulling me back in!!!

      Delete
    2. Yes! You have to go out and find some Black girl Scouts and buy from them! *fist in the air*

      I don't know if you violated the Blackness clause. It just struck me as odd that there were no little Black or Mexican-American or Asian-American girls with them. And, since that gave me pause, it was a good reason not to indulge.

      And, are you quoting the Sopranos quoting the Godfather or quoting the Godfather? Lol.

      Delete
    3. Okay okay Val, I'm zipping my blackness back up and I will make an effort to buy "black" as soon as possible.

      I like to think I'm quoting Shaft, quoting the Sopranos, quoting The Godfather......or something like that.

      Delete
  4. Lol! Can't fight the cookies Reg! A good cookie and a glass of cold milk just hits the spot sometimes:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah Desert Flower I wouldn't trust anyone that didn't like some kind of cookie.

      Delete
  5. OMG ... I'm surprised you bought them cookies ...I never do and I never eat cookies, period ... uhm, where does that leave us ???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cat that's just the Canadian in you. Eating cookies and turning into big fat asses is an American institution. It could be said that the two thirds of Americans that aren't obese are under achievers.

      There are so many different kinds of Girl Sccout cookies that there has to be one that you'd like......probably love Cat.

      Delete
  6. I've never had girl scout cookies. Do they really live up to the hype?
    I don't really like cookies all that much. I prefer moist, creamy desserts. Sometimes chewing is just too much of an effort.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Believe the hype Catintherain. Don't they have some kind of delectable cookie in Romania that everyone just adores?!?

      I don't mind chewing, as long as it's worth the effort.

      Delete
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  8. I hate them damn little girls! I have not bought one box this year... so far! lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I wish I had followed your lead Erica. I ended up buying two boxes of Thin Mints and one box of Peanut Butter Sandwiches, one box of Peanut Butter Patties, one box of Mango Cremes and one box of Thanks-A-Lots.

      ......and now Val has advised me that in order to retain my blackness I must go out and find some black Girl Scouts to buy cookies from.

      Delete
    2. LOL!!! I never see any Black girl scouts in my area... i want some samoas!

      Delete
    3. Careful Erica you don't want to end up on Val's list do you?!? She'll have the drop squad after both you and me!!!!

      Delete
  9. I am a big fan of Samoas (Caramel Delites)...and I didn't think I would because I'm not really a huge fan of coconut, but I can barely taste it in there. I also like the Tagalongs, but my all time favorite, hands down is the richness of the Trefoils (I call them the Shortbreads).

    It is all about proper portioning, Reggie. Don't eat the whole sleeve, just eat two or three cookies. Stretch them out...lol!

    By the way, I am participating in the 30 Days of Days challenge if you want to peek some of the entries. I will be placing up relatively soon some of the changes I've noticed since I have been exercising, since you and others have been curious about it.

    Take care and enjoy your cookies!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Proper proportioning No Labels?!? Don't you know, I've got a wait problem, I can't wait to eat!!!

      When I see these cookies all that eat right shit goes straight out the window. I just want to get those cookies in my piehole as quickly as possible. I guess maybe I need to do better huh?!?

      Delete
  10. Yes, Reggie, just a little better. I guess you get high off instant gratification!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah maybe No Labels, but those cookies are the bomb diggity.

      Delete
  11. I used to love Girl Scout cookies but the cookies have gotten smaller and smaller. I'd rather buy a bag of Oreos :). Now Boy Scout caramel popcorn is my addiction!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've never bought popcorn from the Boy Scouts Mlvlatina....never.

      Delete
    2. Best popcorn I've ever had. So good I don't share lol.

      Delete
    3. Hmmmmmmmmm, maybe I'll give it a shot then?!?

      Delete
  12. I try not to get them buy saying they cost to much for what you get now-a-days. Then some guy at work leaves a sheet out for his daughter where everyone can see it, Hey, why isn't your name on it somebody ask. OK I'll buy a box, I like the mints, but my spouse like these, and my daughter prefer these, These are new, I'll try a box. Got me again...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 1manview that's how they get us. The old standard cookies and the new and improved cookies. I bought 6 boxes of cookies yesterday, but I didn't buy them for me I actually bought them for my 21 year old daughter. She's a senior in college and I'm going to go and see her this weekend. Hopefully I won't eat ANY of the cookies between now and then.

      My wife likes the peanut butter cookies and so does my daughter. I'm an absolute fiend for those Thin Mints though. Those cookies aren't even in my home, they're in the trunk of my car and they're gonna stay there too.

      Delete
  13. The economy must really be bad here because I haven't seen a girl scout at Walmart yet (that's where they usually are)...white or black!
    I love the shortbread cookies though and will usually buy a few boxes.

    Folks around here putting those World's Finest Chocolate Bars in my face like crazy...I love those chocolate bars! I buy'em every time someone has them. I can't resist!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Those shortbread cookies are pretty good too BayouCreole. I will eat the World's Finest Chocolate bars, but I usually end up buying some and giving them to my wife or my daughter........or leaving them on my desk at work for someone to grab.

      Delete
  14. Lord you are just not right. You had to go there didn't you. I was all laughing and giggle on the cookie bit then you had to show me mantits.....dang brother, spare a sistah nah!

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    1. Now Rhapsody Phoenix you know I've gotta trot out the moobs occasionally just to keep the rest of you on your toes.

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  15. It's hard to resist Girl Scout cookies. With Boy Scouts selling popcorn I find it much easier to say no. Heck, I'm doing them a favor by teaching them to deal with rejection at an early age. =)

    Ok, just kidding. But I do tend to buy the cookies more than popcorn...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ya know Shady Grady, I've NEVER bought popcorn from The Boy Scouts.....and I'm not gonna.

      Delete
    2. @Shady_Grady "With Boy Scouts selling popcorn I find it much easier to say no. Heck, I'm doing them a favor by teaching them to deal with rejection at an early age." You know you wrong for that one. But it is so funny.

      Delete
  16. Hahaha! Too funny! Luckily I haven't encountered any of them yet. I'm sure it's coming but I don't carry cash and since they don't accept cards, that usually eliminates me from getting any. LOL! So I just might be safe!

    P.S. That picture of man titties is just gross. Eww!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I actually encountered The Girl Scouts twice before buying some cookies. I don't carry money on myself either. I had to go to the bank and get cash and then go back and buy the cookies.

      Everybody seems to hate on the moobs.

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  18. LMAO, the B cup comment had me laughing but come on reggie it sounds like you got your fittness regime tight, so a cookie every so often can't possibly hurt :))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Truth be told, the two times that I saw those Girl Scouts selling cookies, I was walking. Both days I walked no less than 8 miles. I like to get my walk on, especially during the weekends when I have plenty of time.

      Still........I might have a little moob bounce going on, not much mind you, but just a bit.

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  25. You are a LOON! I can't believe you answer those Anonymous spammers! LMAO

    OMG at the titty pic. *hurls* ...I remember when I DID eat those cookies as a youngster, THIN MINTS were my master. "Oh yes, Thin Mint Master...I will have anudda." LOL Now? Not so much. I'm not a fan of sweets. Every once in a while I'll eat em...so, I've managed to roll right past those Girl Scout imps. lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Those Anonymous spammers are good for a laugh occasionally Kween. I like to talk to them as if they're a real person......sure they suck, but why not just enjoy the moment ya know?!?

      I haven't eaten any Thin Mints yet this year. I actually bought all those cookies for my daughter and I'm going to take them to her tomorrow.

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  28. Screaming with laughter...Reggie I'll be back because you have me coughing and laughing.... You are a MESS!

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  29. You funny, Reggie!

    Because I'm a baker, I'm never tempted by other people's sweets, so I can easily walk by them without even looking in their direction. However, I have been known to donate the cost of 2 or 3 boxes to friends that are selling them for their kids.

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  31. That was truly entertaining...though I know you were serious but still...I have an issue with sweets, I had to go low-carb and workout more...not easy...there's just too much temptation out there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Linda I wouldn't hate those Girl Scouts so much if their cookies weren't so scrumptdilicious!!!!

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  32. I KNOW I commented, but it apparently didn't post. Ugh! Anyway, I cringe every time I see those lil heffas pimpin those overpriced, fiend-inducing cookies. I used to cave and buy them until I realized they get so little of the actual sales.

    When they try to peddle their wares now, I say I can't as I have an eating disorder. The horrified look on the mothers faces is hilarious while the little girls are like "huh?"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like that......I'm gonna start telling the Girl Scouts that I encounter that if I eat their cookies I will die.

      Lay that heavy guilt trip back on their asses.

      Delete
    2. LMAO! That's a good one. Or you could tell them YOU have an eating disorder...That's really throw them ;-)

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  34. I'm SO mad at those man boobs!! I did give in to the cookie call this year. I did really well though. I refused to order Thin Mints because all hell would break loose. I did however get some of those shortbread cookies (which somehow disappeared in a day) and though I'm not a fan of coconut, those coconut cookies are the biz! I suppose I've willed their names out of my mind because the only cookies I can call by name are Thin Mints and Lemonades.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think we all fiend on these cookies because some witch has cast a spell on them or maybe some Master Jedi has performed some kind of master Jedi mind trick on all of us.

      Delete
  35. Man! Those dang Samoas...the only thing that saved me this year are my weird pregnancy taste buds; I don't like sweet things too much but I sure did indulge in my share of thin mints and Samoas (oh coconutty, chocolatey, caramely goodness) I had to put my foot down the other day. These little heffas were singing a song! It was so cute. I almost made another purchase. ALMOST! Lol

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    1. Hey Camile pregnant women do crave the strangest things don't they?

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  57. Ha! My kid is a GS and are hustlers during cookie sesaon! My husband likes his thin mints frozen with milk...I'm not gon even tell you how many boxes he bought cause it is truly shameful.

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    1. Those Thin Mints are the business. But so far this year, I've yet to eat a single one.

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